From the moment he says he didn’t ask for my company thats when I realize things aren’t the same as it was before. Big changes is happening between us. It may come to a point we aren’t lovers, best friend, friend, acquainted anymore.

I just can’t understand, that if we are both alone, it seems I have a lot of responsibility to him. But if we are in groups, he can’t talk or get along with me. As if I wasn’t there all day and night.

If we were both alone, he is very sick, tired, burden, bored…etc. but if he is with others o my he is very happy, overjoyed, alert, really gentleman.

What’s within me? it just makes my tears falls down to my chick that breaks my heart.

He say his death is near for he has unhealthy body and always tired, he would dream of his dead relatives and spooky stuffs. Well to his knowings, I am sure I’ll be the first one to lay down in the coffin, for I have physical burden which I believe I contributed alot to our relationship. I feel my body is dying and aching inside that as time goes by I am use to the pain it brings me. I’m not clamoring anymore for no one hears me even my family. I hope one day it would not come to a point that I will fall surprisingly.

Physically, mentally, emotionally I am dying slowly.

His hugs are the only one left I have felt I need to stay and be alive.