Whisper Lovecraft

He is not already my companion, my partner in crime. He never share his plan, he has throw away our plans. He has never ask me abiut my plan.
When he is finished and made his plans and decision, thats the time he would ask me what will be my plan, as if he wants us [...]

Ok he has already plan for next year and sad thing is that I do not belong to his plans.
I know in his heart that he wants to be with his fried flat bread, because with her, he so happy and enjoys life positively – “law of attraction”. He will be inspired and will have [...]

I have to go home. I have to feel my presence in my own family for I feel invisible here in my independent life.
Why do I ahve to be jealous when I don’t have the right anymore? WHy all those approaches he have for others are very nice, a gentleman, very heroic, full of energy, [...]

I now know what is my disposstion in his life. TO be there and act as manly and womanly at the same time.
I don’t know how long my body will last long, I feel tired and dead. I am very very to sensitive to all utters and makes me feel dumb and numb.
I [...]

I had mention to him he had spoken he loves me, but he didn’t remember. And what I have in mind is that I think it wasn’t for me or it was just a spell of words from a motionless mouth. This is the time I now know that when he speaks when he is [...]

He said he loves me when he is half awake resting. I guess he is so tard. I didn’t know what to response but just said I love him too.

I cannot be as jolly as it can be like before. For everytime I make moves or do say something, join in some discussion and have some jokes THEN, (yes a big THEN!) if I make something which he doesn’t like or for him it was wrong he then have a frown in his face..his [...]

I can reach already his points of views in life…we don’t share much of brilliant and factful ideas and plans..
Maybe this is part of letting go and moving on..